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Breaking the Baby Boy Mindset
1/31/2014 4:42:45 PM

(left to right): Ving Rhames and Tyrese from the 2001 flim 'Baby Boy'

By Pastor E.A. Deckard, Special from the Houston Forward-Times

“A nation or civilization that continues to produce soft-minded men purchases its own spiritual death on an installment plan.” - Dr Martin Luther King, Jr.

In 2001, John Singleton produced a very popular movie, entitled Baby Boy starring Tyrese Gibson and Snoop Dogg. The movie is centered around the life of a character named Jody who was a young black man being raised by a single mother in the hood while contending with the struggle to become a man. The main character Jody, in the movie, was also referred to as “Baby Boy” because he had the mindset of a child and was totally dependent on the care of his mother.

Unfortunately this theme is still being played out on the big screen and in the lives of young men across America. “Baby Boy” took no responsibility for his life or actions, possessed no level of self-discipline, and continued to display an immature attitude toward life.

Until, we as a community come together to coach and educate the single mother families in our communities and churches we will continue to see the “Baby Boys” of this generation creating negative situations for themselves and others. The alarming facts are staring us in the face: increased number of drop outs, excessive crimes being committed, early fatherhood, and low self-esteem are all factors in the “Baby Boy” mind-set.

Today my focus through FORWARD THINKING is to release six principles to break the baby boy mind-set and empower men to develop into men after God’s own heart.


CHALLENGE YOURSELF - The bible declares you can do all things therefore I challenge you to make up your mind this season of your life to stop making excuses and start making progress. Tiger Woods once stated the hardest part of being a champion is not defeating my opponent but challenging myself to rise to whatever level of excellence is needed to win. I know life may sometimes feel like an uphill battle but remember hurdles are to be leaped, odds are to be defeated, and haters are to be silenced. I challenge you to challenge yourself to becoming a better you this year no matter what your current situation looks like.

CHECK YOUR HABITS - Your habits are simply who you are therefore it is very important in this season of your life that you evaluate all your habits. You will never be able to improve the quality of your life beyond the quality of your habits. Keep in mind your habits are the vehicle transporting you where you are going in life.

CREATE ACCOUNTIBLITY GROUP - Assume responsibility for your life. Brothers stop depending on your mother to take full responsibility for the affairs of your life and also stop blaming the lack of a father in your life for the poor decisions you’ve made in your life. Regardless of your current situation it’s time to surround yourself with people who will push you, lift you, and if need be check you. Understand a man that does not take responsibility for his destiny will always end up being a man full of regrets and excuses. Accountability motto: I AM THE REASON I’M HERE AND I’LL BE THE REASON I GET UP FROM HERE

CONTINUE TO PRESS - There is an old saying quitters never win and winners never quit therefore I encourage you to continue to press and never give up. As I watched the Seattle Seahawks defeat the San Francisco 49ers for a trip to the Super Bowl the quarterback of the Seahawks (drafted behind 6 other quarterbacks) Russell Wilson stated he used being over looked as motivation to push himself into being the best player he could be. This season of your life make up your mind you will push until you win.

CONFIDENCE TO DREAM BIG - The bible states that God is able to do more than we can think, ask, or image therefore we must release our faith and gain the confidence to dream big. I challenge you stop focusing on what you can’t do or have not been able to do in your past and start dreaming big. There is a great big world just waiting on you to take your place and the first step is dreaming big enough to see yourself there. In the face of social injustice Dr King had to faith to dream big.

COMMIT TO EQUIPPING YOURSELF - We have all heard the definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result. In order to improve the quality of your life you must commit to equipping yourself with a mind-set powerful enough to cancel the “baby boy” mind-set you once possessed. This season you must put new tools in your hand, new knowledge in your head, expose your eyes to new sights, and allow your feet to travel new circles.

In conclusion, as FORWARD THINKERS we must overcome the “Baby Boy” mind-sets and mature into responsible men capable of leading, guiding, and protecting our communities.

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