By Victoria Rae Moore
Imagine this scene; a woman gazing deeply into her lover’s eyes as she mutters the words, “I love you. I am nothing without you. You complete me.”
Romantic, right? But what if that isn’t a good thing? There are challenges couples will inevitably face.
Among these is the fact that it takes two whole individuals to create one whole relationship. Sometimes conflict happens because we are missing something within our self and expecting or depending on others to compensate for what we lack.
So, what does it mean to be a whole person? Simply put, being whole means being healthy and happy. This includes mental, emotional and spiritual health.
Characteristics of a whole person include self-awareness, self-confidence and self-reliance. Whole people do not make decisions out of fear.
Have you ever felt angry because your partner was not making you feel fulfilled? This may mean one or both of you have some personal work to do. Maybe your partner is neglecting you because he or she is dealing with an internal deficit. Or maybe no matter what your partner does, you cannot feel fulfilled because there’s a gap somewhere in your well-being that only you can fill.
Whether you are married, dating or still in search of that special someone, I encourage you to form a deep, committed relationship with yourself. Know your weaknesses and instead of accepting them, challenge yourself to improve and strengthen them.
There are steps you can take to becoming more whole like reading, deepening your faith and working with a counselor, pastor or trusted mentor. Self-improvement should feel exciting, not shameful. It’s a personal journey and will have a positive impact in every aspect of your life.
The next time you start to call your spouse your “other half,” remember you must be two whole individuals, not two halves. Don’t strain your relationship by relying on him or her to complete you. Be assured the ability to enjoy life comes from within and there are some needs only faith can fulfill.
Note: I would love to hear from you! Email thoughts, questions, reflections or personal relationship stories to firstname.lastname@example.org